brittany-+'My+Annabel'

“My Annabel” “I am here to tell you a story. A story that will torture your thought by day and poison your dreams by night. And though I will do my best, there are no words that can be written, nor brush strokes laid on canvas that can describe this stark and utter horror of the night that Annabel died…” And these are just the opening lyrics. The opening lyrics to the song I was listening when I got that heartbreaking message the night Ayden was in that awful accident. What if Ayden became me Annabel from that song? What if this night was a stark and utter horror? At that moment all I wanted to do was sit alone, cry, and pretend that everything was alright. But it wasn’t. What if it never would be? What if Ayden really became permanently damaged? What if he didn’t remember me? So many things raced through my mind. There was so much I wanted to say, but nothing would come out. I wanted to scream as if it would cause all this to just go away and make everything return to normal, but, again, nothing would come out. Then, everything went black. I woke up in a room of the hospital. Guess my parents saw me and freaked. Usually they tell me to just take Tylenol and get over it. I knew it was a hospital, even though most patients people see on those bizarre crime shows have no clue where they are when they first regain consciousness. And how did I know this was a hospital? No, I’m not some super genius kid or the next Einstein. The room was white, it was cold, it smelled of antiseptics, and there were IV poles everywhere. Doesn’t take much to make a hospital room, does it? Moments later the doctor came in wanting to know how I felt. I simply told him, “Sir, with al due respect, if your best friend was in a car wreck last night, you had no idea how he was, all you knew was that he was in the hospital, then you passed out, became deeply unconscious, and woke up in a hospital, how would you feel?” “Well, at least we know your memory’s good,” he replied in a harsh tone. Guess he wasn’t in the mood. Yes, what I said to him may have been inconsiderate but I wasn’t really in the mood to be poked with needles and given even more medicine. I need to know how Ayden was, and that was my first priority. No matter what the doctors thought. Well, I knew the doctors wouldn’t care that I wanted to see Ayden, but I never imagined they’d end up having to sit on me to keep me from going to find him. We came to a conclusion. My doctor gave me Ayden’s room number so I could see him as soon as I was discharged. Thankfully he wasn’t too far. I made the doctors finish my tests so I could be released sooner, and within twenty minutes I was cleared and literally ran down to Ayden’s room. What I saw from the window really was an utter horror…just as I had imagined. The doctors assured me they were going to fix him and all his scrapes and cuts. They let me in his room so I could sit with him for a while. Thankfully my best friend was still asleep. I really didn’t want him to see me like this. I was an absolute mess. He’d be all, “Oh, Hayley, don’t cry. You snot too much when you cry.” - Charming, isn’t he? – “Besides, Hayl, I’ll be okay. I’m your invincible, remember?” When we were little I dared him to jump off the top of my bunk bed. He did. The fall and landing? Clumsy. That’s really the only word I can use. I freaked out and started screaming my head off because he didn’t move for a good thirty seconds. He then jumped up and screamed, “I’m alive!” I hugged him as hard as a seven-year-old can hug and told him he must be invincible to survive a crash like that. He’s joked about the invincible thing ever since. Anyways, the doctors had already taken out most of the glass that was embedded in his skin making some the wounds to look worse than they actually were. I sat on the bed he was laid on ad help the hand that wasn’t battered, cut, or bruised. His hand was perfect. In the same shape as it had been the last time I’d seen him. I tried to remember all the good times we’d had together. Heck, there weren’t any bad ones. Every moment we’d spent together was a good one. We’d laugh…we’d laugh to the point where we’d cry. We’d tell each other everything. When our families went out to eat we always knew what the other would get. It was like we were twins separated at birth. I began to fear that in the future there would just be me, that there wouldn’t be anymore “together” moments I could hold on to forever. I felt more tears start to fall form my eyes. I couldn’t help it. I knew I was thinking negatively, but I’ve always been a “What If” person, which made me think of awful things that could happen that most likely never would. Oh well, the only thing I could do then was sit there and not move until he woke up. And that’s exactly what I did. The doctors gave me blankets so I could sleep on the god-awful uncomfortable couch in the room, but knowing that Ayden was there was enough to keep me there. I woke up early the next morning to find a still-unconscious Ayden. My heart sank a little. Yes, I wanted to be there, and awake, when he woke up, but I really wish he’d just wake up already. I got a shower and had the morning doctor bring me some breakfast. The doctor, whose name I learned was Dr. Henderson (but she said to just call her Kelly), brought me my favorite cereal, Captain Crunch – I’d die in the mornings if it didn’t exist. She sat in the room with me while I ate and talked to me. It was nice to have someone to talk to. Kelly was a fairly young doctor so she could relate to some of what I was talking about. “Ya know, you really are the greatest friend. Ya know, since you’re staying here with him even though he has no idea that you’re here,” she told me. “Well, Kelly, he’s my best friend; and he’s been my best friend since kindergarten. I don’t think I could ever leave him in this sort of state.” “It’s so cool your friendship has lasted so long. All my friends from kindergarten ended up being replaced by fifth grade.” “Oh. Well our parents are friends so our families are together all the time.” “Ah. I understand. Oh goodness! – I must be going. There’s so much I have to do. Hopefully Ayden will wake up soon. He shouldn’t be too long.” And just like that, Kelly left the room, and I was left alone with Ayden again. I held his hand again, ridiculously hoping he could feel that I wanted him to wake up. Even if he woke up just for a little bit, it’d be enough time to tell him good-bye and that I really loved him. And almost as if he could really hear my thoughts, Ayden woke up. I couldn’t say anything. I was absolutely speechless. All I could do was sit there with his hand in mine, look at him with the biggest look of hope and desperation. He looked back at me as if to say, “Hey, don’t you worry. I’m okay.” I started crying again - jeez I cry a lot – but this time, they were tears of joy. And right on key Ayden said, “Hayley, don’t cry. You snot too much when you cry. Look at me, I’m awake, I’m okay. I survived, and here in a few months we can go back to doing all the crazy crap we did before. Just stay by my side and never leave.” I knew from that moment on that there was no need for negative thinking. There was no point in thinking that the worst things could happen. Ayden was safe, he was alive, and he remembered me. At that moment, that was all I needed.